A trip to the bank

The trip to the bank today made my fucking week. I was off school early and thought I'd use this to my advantage since I had stuff to do at the bank. I got home, changed clothes and went out again. When I got to the bank, I see that there are one person at the desk, and one in line.

The first thing that happened the moment I set my foot inside the door was that this old weird lady mentioned something I quite didn't get, something about me being some evil money collector, I turn around and go "What?". She just looks at me weird. I sit down and wait for my turn.

I notice that this weird lady has some kind of problem, 'cause she's opening and closing her mouth all the time, and I mean all the fucking time. Suddenly she looks at me and starts mentioning names, I don't remember them, but she names at least 15 people in rapid succession. I just sit there and try to ask her why she's mentioning these names. She just goes on and on. Suddenly, she stops for a second. I thought this was my time to answer, but i didn't know what the hell to say, she just mentioned loads of names.

Just when I was about to ask what the fuck that was all about, she started talking again. This time she mentioned this money collector shit again, and goes on about him killing people, drugging people, beating people, poking out eyes of people, selling people. Then she asks me; "Do you think that's OK?". I'm so baffled that the only thing I can come up with is: "I guess not". She looks at me, goes on with the same sentence as before, with the poking of eyes, selling people and killing people, and then she asks if it would have been okay if it was my life, my family, my kids.

At this moment I'm thinking "What the fuck is wrong with this bitch?". She goes on and on about this guy killing people. Then she says "I don't even know the guy", and mentions another name, a female name this time. Suddenly this dude who was in front of me in line, some foreign guy pokes me on the should. I thought he knew this old lady and was gonna warn me about talking to her, but he just looks at me for a few seconds and walk off.

The old crazy lady was next in line - she just walks up to the desk, and I don't really get what she's saying, but right before she's done she starts talking about dude that kills people and that she doesn't want to pay him, but she has no choice, 'cause he'll sell her and kill her and poke her eyes out and shit. I am so about to burst into high laugh when she walks out still rambling names and how they'll kill her and poke her eyes out and shit. I don't even think she did anything at the desk.

I'm up next, and I can see the lady at the desk looking at me with this "Damn, I see you want to laugh, but that would be mean", look. I keep it together, get my shit done and walk out. NOW I burst into laughter. This was fucking brilliant.

- Pingu